


I Will Not Be Far Away

by boingboing



Category: Sanctuary (Manga)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-16
Updated: 2010-12-16
Packaged: 2017-10-13 17:06:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/139615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boingboing/pseuds/boingboing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Burying Asami had to be the hardest thing for Hojo to do. Tokai would make sure he supported his boss in whatever way necessary.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Will Not Be Far Away

**Author's Note:**

  * For [galerian_ash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/galerian_ash/gifts).



Like many men of his time and occupation, Tokai didn't have much use for Gods or Deities, except for when it suited him. Even now, standing in front of his wife's grave, his thoughts didn't offer up prayers for her soul. Instead he stood there hoping that perhaps she had forgiven him for his neglect; maybe she even had forgiven him for his idiocy.

At one time he had the excuse that it was just the way of the yakuza. Live fast, die hard or some equally stupid bullshit thing he was thinking back then.

Now he was older. Hopefully he was wiser, too, but he didn't hold out much stock in that.

When Ozaki pulled out his cigarettes, the movement caught Tokai's attention. Tokai fished around for a lighter and flicked the flame to life, holding it out for the detective. "I'm ready," he said with a dramatic release of his thumb.

"For what?" Ozaki exhaled, eyes squinting against the setting sun.

"For you to take me in. I just wanted to say goodbye to the old lady before you took me into custody."

Ozaki waved his hand dismissively and turned to head for the car. "Why would I want your trash littering up my cells?"

"I'm a wanted man, you fuck. Figured you'd want my kind off your streets." Tokai fell into step with Ozaki, reaching into the other man's jacket to get a cigarette for himself.

"Tell you what. Wait until Hojo and Dietman Asami return." Ozaki opened the car door and settled behind the wheel. "If you still want to do time after that, I'll oblige you."

"Yeah, fine." Tokai followed Ozaki in, buckled up and let the window down.

"Want to go to the airport to meet Hojo?"

"I wasn't planning on it." He turned a pointed look to Ozaki, who'd screwed up his plans by not arresting him. "I'll just meet him at Asami's residence. That's where he's headed with the casket. Miyamura and Murata are picking them up. "

"So you gonna tell him?"

"Fuck no. Got enough failures racked up in my life. Not about to tell him my attempt to be a man failed." Tokai's laugh was loud enough to be heard over the rush of the wind through the window.

Keeping one hand on the steering wheel, Ozaki planted his other firmly against Tokai's shoulder and shoved him roughly into the door. "I don't mean that, dumbass. I mean about you being in love with him."

"Have you told the Deputy Chief you're in love with her?"

"Fuck you."

Tokai sneered at Ozaki and shoved him back. The car swerved across a lane of traffic, causing a cacophony of annoyed horns to blare after them. "If you'd actually follow through, sure. And I haven't told him for the same reason you haven't told Kyoko."

"You're full of shit."

"I'm also right."

"First time for anything."

***

Black sedans stretched along the street from corner to corner in front of Dietman Asami's home. Suits in all varieties milled around out front, along the path leading up to the entrance to the house. Some of the suits were small, muscle and enforcement, bodyguards and assistants. Some were big; bosses from various parts of the region, politicians, big business. Tokai could tell by the cut of the suit who was who.

Ozaki stopped the car and Tokai got out, slamming the door behind him and garnering his share of stares. Tokai ducked back into the open car window to look at Ozaki. "You coming to the funeral?" he asked.

"Yeah. Figured I'd be there."

Tokai patted the top of the car. "Right. See you then," and watched the car pull away. Once it disappeared around the corner, he squared his shoulders, lit another cigarette and headed into the house.

Although the place was filled with public figures, divergent backgrounds and philosophies set aside for this brief time out of respect for the deceased, it still held the grave atmosphere of a viewing. The air stretched with tension, thumping lightly in tempo with the hushed banter of deals being struck, even at such a somber occasion. The US Trade Representative hadn't wasted any time getting there. Her bottle-blonde hair and typical western dress stood out amid the blacks of suits and the subdued prints of the _iromuji_. Her eyes were red-rimmed but her makeup was impeccable. Asami must have been doing her. He wondered if Asami's girlfriend, Yuki, knew.

That made him snort. Now he was starting to entertain thoughts like those of a gossiping old hag.

Tokai saw Hojo in the center of a tightly collected group. The don looked like he'd just stepped out of his wardrobe, pressed and clean shaven. There was no fooling him, though. Tokai knew that Hojo hadn't slept in days. Having been there when Asami died, Hojo would have taken care of all the details of getting the dietman's body back through customs, to have it interred here for the viewing and making the final arrangements for the funeral.

Now Tokai felt guilty that he hadn't bothered to shave that morning.

"Mr. Tokai."

Brought out of his thoughts, Tokai headed over where Hojo beckoned for him, joining the circle of men surrounding Hojo. "If you'll excuse me, gentlemen," Hojo said. " I need a moment with Mr. Tokai." Hojo didn't offer any apologies, just hooked his hand beneath Tokai's arm and guided him through the house to a small office off the main hall.  
.  
The door shut and he watched Hojo's shoulders slump. It wasn't a large moment. Almost imperceptible, but Tokai recognized it immediately. "When was the last time you rested, boss?

Hojo laughed and the exhaustion was clear to Tokai. "Am I that easy to read?"

"For some. Asami would have seen it."

"He would have seen right through me. It doesn't surprise me that you see it, too."

Tokai leaned against the desk and watched Hojo cross to the picture window that overlooked Asami's garden. "I see it as exhaustion, yeah. So?"

"So?"

"How long?"

Hojo glanced over his shoulder at Tokai. "I'll rest after the funeral."

Tokai jammed his hands in his pockets and gave Hojo his best 'fuck you' look. It usually made his boys kowtow without any more grief. It only made Hojo chuckle. It figured that he wouldn't be able to bend a man of Hojo's metal.

"I lost count after forty-six hours. But I did take fast naps along the way," Hojo finished rapidly, turning his attention back to the gardens.

That put an end to Tokai's questions and they entered a state of comfortable silence.

Eventually, Hojo broke it. "Tokai, may I make a selfish request and ask that you stay with me?"

"Did that rat Ozaki spill his guts?"

"I talked with his boss earlier when she called to find out the funeral arrangements," Hojo said. "When were you going to tell me?"

Tokai shifted his weight uncomfortably. He really had wanted to drift away quietly and let Hojo continue his climb to the top without further burden. "I wasn't. Just gonna do it."

"You always try to leave me. It never sticks."

"No, it don't." Ozaki was right. Tokai never made it a secret to anyone that he was in love with Hojo. But he refused to tell Hojo himself. It seemed like the right thing to do -- to stay out of the way while Hojo built a future with Asami. Asami, the man Tokai was sure Hojo loved. In fact, here Tokai was, a successful underboss in his own right, still willing to do the same thing a second time. It was a testament to the kind of man Hojo Akira was.

Hojo. A man who could see through all the bullshit and know the truth. Tokai should have known there wasn't any way to hide his feelings.

"So stay now," Hojo said. "With Tashihiro and Nakajo in Okinawa, I need people I can trust to keep things on track." Hojo walked up to Tokai and rested his hand on his shoulder.

"You have the other bosses." He gave Hojo a self-deprecating smile. "Miyamura, Murata, Iwata. They're better suited for this politicking shit. I'm nothing more than a blunt club for you."

"Do you think I don't have a need for that? Don't tell me you've forgotten what it means to be yakuza," Hojo said, smiling in return. "Legitimate or not." His gaze swept over Tokai's face and Tokai felt as if Hojo touched him with just a look. Tokai's knees liquefied. Fuck Hojo for being able to reduce him to that state of a quivering mess.

Tokai shoved his hand through his hair. Probably time to brush it since he'd been up for almost thirty-six hours himself. He nodded once in assent. "Not going nowhere," he said.

"I'm glad you've changed your mind."

Their conversation was interrupted when Miyamura knocked on the door and stepped in. He cleared his throat discreetly. "Sorry to disturb you, Hojo," he said with a polite bow. "Aoki, the director of the Hokuto Bank is here and Mr. Ibuki wanted a private word with you before you start the meeting, when you're ready."

"Thank you, Miyamura." Hojo looked at Tokai again and gave his shoulder one more squeeze before he followed Miyamura from the room. "We have work to do."It was clear that Hojo expected him to be there. Tokai shrugged and trailed along behind.

Wasn't like he could ever really say no and make it stick.

***

Meetings were never Tokai's thing. He hated them. A lot of talking that led to finally getting around to action and all about a problem that could have been solved if someone had just made a decision and went with it.

A few loud sighs brought an amused glance from Hojo. "Is the meeting boring you, Tokai?" he asked.

"No." Tokai straightened in his seat but the weight of Hojo's attention made him a little uncomfortable. "Well, yeah. This is all just bullshit," he said. He waved his arms around the table at the other assembled bosses in emphasis.

"How so?"

"We're doing a lot of talking and not a lot of doing." He fished around for his cigarettes, brow furrowing in a frown when he realized that he'd finished the pack an hour ago.

"This is preparation for Dietman Asami's funeral," Miyamura said reasonably. "That _would_ imply there is _some_ doing going on."

"And plans have to be made to back Kariya's nomination as prime minister." Murata spread his hands face down on the table. "Provided we can get Isaoka's support. He was the one who nominated Asami."

" _Can_ we count on his further support?" asked Iwata. The discussion drifted toward shit Tokai didn't think was important. Asami was still dead and Hojo's hand was still on his arm.

He sighed again. His head was starting to hurt. His arm tingled.

"Tokai." Hojo leaned over to him and spoke low while the debate waged on. Tokai could feel the warmth of Hojo's grip as he wrapped his fingers around his wrist. "Perhaps you can assist Onishi with the security details for the funeral."

"Yes, sir." Tokai tried not to rush from the room, grateful to be out of there, but he was desperate to do anything other than sit there and listen to talk that wasn't even related to business.

***

One thing Tokai had determined once the funeral was finally over was that he wasn't going to get buried when he died. It was his intent to be cremated and let them dump his ashes in the bay because this was a lot of bullshit for one man who wasn't there to see it. Even if the man was a great one.

 _"Funerals are for the living, not for the dead,"_ Ozaki pointed out as they left the cemetery.

Tokai wouldn't disagree and for someone of Asami's stature, it was right he would given a grand send off. Not for someone like him, though. Best left as fish food.

Riding in the back of the car with Hojo, Tokai could see the toll the funeral was taking on his boss. The man put up a good front. He had to. All eyes were on Hojo, now left without his main arm of support in the political arena.

And left without a good friend.

What would this mean for the organization? For Tokai? He wished he'd paid attention in that meeting now.

"You're frowning, Tokai."

Well, shit. He never was very good at keeping expressions from his face. Expressions telegraphed his emotions which was a dangerous thing to do around someone like Hojo. "It's nothing."

"Somehow, I doubt that. Anything that bothers you, Tokai, is never trivial."

To his relief their car was back at Asami's home and Tokai could deflect the rest of the conversation simply by being involved with other things.

It was almost midnight, long after they'd laid Asami to rest, that the final guests departed and Tokai directed the men to start closing up the house in preparation for the estate sale. It became clear that besides the security force, Hojo and he were the only two of the bosses left on the premises.

"You're not going home tonight, Hojo?" Tokai leaned against the doorjamb to Asami's office. He watched Hojo's silhouette in the darkened room as he sat at the large mahogany desk.

"I want one more night here before it's sold."

"Why don't you buy it? I'm sure the organization could find some use for it."

"It's being sold to fund Kamiya's bid for the Prime Minister nomination," Hojo said. "Besides, we already have enough properties on the books."

"Didn't you have anything you wanted to take away as a memento?" Tokai held up some vase he was sure cost a fortune and waggled it at Hojo. From what Tokai could tell in his few days there, nothing had been taken or moved.

"I will." Hojo rocked to his feet, the chair twirling as he stepped away from it. "Something that will have great significance to me." He stopped in front of Tokai. There was no time for reaction when their mouths met in a fierce kiss.

The knee-liquifying things Hojo did to him. All he could do was clutch at the waist of Hojo's jacket. When they broke apart, Tokai's breath came shallow and fast. His mouth tingled from where their lips touched. His body thought this was a grand idea. "What about- I mean, isn't this a- Asami's memory-"

"This would be in his memory."

"What?" Tokai missed something important, apparently.

"I never did this with Asami. It wasn't like that between us."

That was hard for Tokai to believe. Once the association between Asami and Hojo had been forced into the open, it was clear to all who saw them together just how they felt about each other.

Hojo chuckled. "You don't believe me."

"I think you're full of shit. He meant a lot to you."

"Oh, I'm not denying he did. We had been through so much together. But there's love for my twin star, and other types of love." Hojo slid his finger down over Tokai's lips to tap at his chin. "I would have thought if anyone understood _that_ , it would be you."

 _They'd never known each other that way_. There was only one 'that way' Tokai understood and the tongue down his throat made it pretty clear it was what Hojo meant as well. It held heavy significance for Tokai.

He followed Hojo toward Asami's bedroom, picking up Hojo's immaculate clothing as it fell away from his perfect body. It was sort of a disappointment that Tokai didn't get to do that but Hojo was Hojo and he usually did what he wanted and expected those around him to keep up. Tokai left his own clothing in a trail of crumpled heaps.

A part of him protested. Taking Hojo to Asami's bed seemed disrespectful. Funny, it was only a really tiny part that balked. In a way, it was fitting, kind of like a final tribute. He knew Hojo loved Asami. Asami loved Hojo in return and now Tokai was there to take Asami's place, in whatever small way he could.

As their bodies slid together and he heard Hojo's voice wrapped around his name, Tokai realized just how grateful he was that Ozaki hadn't taken him up on that offer to turn himself in.

That would have been a fucking waste.


End file.
